Holiday Resources for Productive Dialogue

Thanksgiving draws near.

For many Americans, the holiday spurs a mix of emotions - gratitude and anticipation, for sure, but sometimes mixed with an anxiety verging on dread. Will the people gathered around the heaped-high table behave and get along?  Or will old resentments and new provocations lead to unpleasantness? And how much higher are the risks of a storm this year - after a national election that stirred, and continues to stir, such high emotions?

Since 2017, C70's Can We Talk? program has been helping Americans of all ages hold productive, civil conversations about society's most challenging issues. So, we're here to help you navigate the holidays, sharing some of what we've learned by doing - in the real world with real people.

Ground rules for productive dialogue

Every Can We Talk? dialogue uses a set of nine ground rules for productive dialogue that we've refined over the years. You can review the rules - and the thinking behind them here. (It might be a good idea to share these links with your family beforehand.)

Multiple Identities

One of our favorite civil dialogue gurus, Loretta Ross, once told us something very wise: "Remember, those other people are just as complicated as you are. They're not just the one thing you're mad at them about." An ice-breaking exercise we developed, called Multiple Identities, helps folks learn about and connect with, in a fun way, the complexity of another person.

Asking Different Questions

Let us share one other helpful piece of the Can We Talk? curriculum for high school educators that Seventy has developed in the last two years: It's a guide on how to ask good, clarifying questions that keep a conversation going, rather than ending in confrontation.

For a Listen...

Finally, peeking into the archives, we found this podcast we recorded after the last time Donald Trump won the presidency, titled: How to Navigate Holiday Dinner (and Uncle George) in the Age of Trump.  In it, Dr. Harris Sokoloff,  co-founder of Can We Talk?, chats with another dialogue expert, Sharon Browning.

We hope these resources can help you have a meaningful and civil holiday.  (If we could do something to guarantee the long weekend would be capped by an Eagles win, we'd do that - but our powers, alas, are not limitless).

Written by Chris Satullo, co-founder of Can We Talk?